Its a little hard to put into words the experience of growing up in North Richmond, just one of the neighborhoods in the city where drugs and crime have the upper hand. I remember being almost immune to the sound of gunshots because they were so common. I also remember having to walk the same sidewalk where a woman's brains had been splattered the night before, on my way to get the bus to school. And then, there was that time when there was a drive-by on my street, where several people were gunned down, at 7:30 in the morning while kids were heading to the bus stop for school. I would have been amongst those gunned down had I not already been at school because I had an early class that year. Heavy experiences for youth and everyone else who desired to live in peace.

If I said that the killing of this young mother was a surprise I'd be lying. The entire city has a reputation. Just this past Sunday, a couple of guys actually walked into a church in Richmond and opened fire. A church! Luckily, nobody died, but two people were hit, this time the intended targets. Its pure senseless madness, and it has me wondering, what will come of us? Us as people who still live in neighborhoods like this. Us as people who want to go back to our neighborhoods bearing resources. Us as a people. Period. Do you have any idea how much of a challenge it is to rise above these kinds of conditions? When you are living in the middle of a war zone and every direction points in, instead of out?

I just really feel for this woman's children. In a split second, two children were left without their mother, and a baby will never get to take its first breath.

Below is a song by a couple of friends of mine who go by the name The Wryters. They give a little account of what its like growing up in Richmond from the perspective of young black men. Take a listen.

I don't know about you, but I am really fed up with crime in general, but especially crime against women and children. I can only hope that one day, we will be able to send our children out into the world without the fear that they will never return. And trust those who are suppose to be officially trustworthy to provide love and care to our children instead of harm. My heart goes out to the family of Sandra Cantu and to their entire community because they have now experienced the unspeakable.

I am personally having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that the accused holds an important position within the church, but then again, I do think that many of us STILL are in denial that within all of us lie demons. We can not hold people up as deities when they are but flesh & blood, just like us. Not to say that we should have to go around with our children tied to us 24/7 or that we should be looking over our shoulders and watching our backs at every turn... but should we?

What are your thoughts?

-Johannes Mehserle had a bail hearing today, in which bail was granted. The judge set bail at $3 million, stating that Mehserle was not a flight risk or a danger to the community.

-Mehserle has hired a new attorney who is arguing that the crime committed was not murder, but manslaughter.

-A second officer, Tony Pirone, is currently under investigation. Pirone, who pinned Grant's head to the ground with his knee right before Mehserle fired his gun was also seen, on video, leaving a man unattended to go punch a restrained Grant in the face, knocking him to the ground.

-"Resisting arrest" charges dropped against a man who was beaten by Mehserle a few weeks before the killing of Oscar Grant.

-Oakland police department under investigation in cases involving the mishandling of warrants.

-Mehserle says that he "thought Grant had a gun". (at what point, since Grant's hands were behind his back?)

-News of the "bail, not jail" led to more angry protests today in Oakland and heavy police presence was enforced to try to avoid rioting.

-UC Berkeley's BAMN (Coalition to Defend Affirmative Action, Integration
& Immigrant Rights, and Fight for Equality By Any Means Necessary) teamed up with other UC campuses, including Riverside, Santa Barbara, and Santa Cruz for a statewide march for demands in the case:

• Jail All the Killer Cops
• End BART's and District Attorney Orloff's cover-up—Open an independent public investigation of the murder
• Disarm the BART police, and keep the BART police out of Oakland
• Drop all the charges against protesters

Since the mini riot in Oakland, CA, there have been a number of other peaceful protests in Oakland and San Francisco, as well as members of the community and community leaders attending meetings with BART and the district attorney's office. There has been an overwhelming push for the arrest of Johannes Mehserle, the former BART police officer who killed Oscar Grant on New Years day, and now it has finally happened. Mehserle was arrested yesterday in Nevada on a warrant for murder that was issued by Alameda County. The Bay Area now awaits Mehserle's return. You can read more about his arrest --->here<---.

Although this is a victory toward justice, there is still the possibility that there will be no justice for Oscar Grant in this case. Authorities have worries about finding an impartial jury should this case go to trial. Will the jury be able to view the video evidence without police bias? They feel that the level of emotion surrounding the case and the personal experiences and views of people concerning the police will not allow for a fair trial. Will this trial be a repeat of the Rodney King trial, which also had video evidence? Will Mehserle walk? With little faith in the justice system, he could, but I see that being difficult to explain since he was clearly captured firing the fatal shot. In any case, I hope Mehserle now has his story straight because we are all waiting to hear it.

The fight continues as there will be another protest today in Oakland calling for justice. Protesters will stage a "die-in", where they will lay face down on the ground with their hands behind their backs. They have also built a coffin that will also be used symbolically during the protest. Aside from community leaders and ordinary citizens rallying around this issue, UC Berkeley's civil rights activist group BAMN (Coalition to Defend Affirmative Action, Integration
& Immigrant Rights, and Fight for Equality By Any Means Necessary) has also gotten involved in the "movement".

BAMN organizer and UCB alum Ronald Cruz writes,

This is an important first victory for the movement fighting for justice
for Oscar Grant. We can and must make sure that Mehserle and all the cops
who assisted are convicted and that killings like this never happen again
in Oakland. We must continue to stand strong and fight for our demands:

* Jail all the killer cops
* End the BART cover-up—Open a public investigation of the murder
* Disarm the BART Police—BART Police Out of Oakland
* Drop all charges against protesters

MARCH TODAY from Oakland City Hall to the District Attorney's office
Demand justice for Oscar Grant!

Senseless violence. Senseless police violence. Senseless police violence toward a black man.

Another senseless murder of a black man at the hands of a police officer.

I have been trying to come to terms with this ever since the news hit. I did not personally know the man who was killed, but I do know him... we all do, at least those of us who are aware of the historical murdering and police brutality of black men in this country. On the heels of the murder of Sean Bell, who was unarmed at the time he was shot 41 times in New York by police, Oscar Grant of Hayward, CA has joined the list of victims. Like Sean, Oscar leaves behind the woman that he had hoped to marry and their 4 year old daughter. Everyone is trying to figure out why and how this could happen. Again!

If the crime itself is not horrible enough, the sequence of events leading up to Oscar's death have been in heavy rotation across the tv screen. Yes, this time the whole thing was caught on video. Several videos from several angles shot by hand held cameras and cell phones. Showing a handcuffed Oscar being held to the ground by a couple of officers, one of which held his knee on Oscar's head, and a short time later the other drawing his weapon like he was at a showdown in the old West firing a shot into Oscar's back. Although the evidence is there. Murder in plain sight. Officials did not question, arrest or anything else, the officer who fired the fatal shot. They instead are asking the public not to "create stories to go along with what they have seen on tape", while allowing the officer to seek refuge under his lawyer. He hasn't been asked what happened. Why he drew his weapon when there was no threat to his life at the time. Why he fired that weapon into the back of an unarmed, handcuffed man. But, while Oscar Grant is currently laying in a casket, in a church being mourned, the officer involved is under police protection because he is now receiving death threats. I will not say that he should be fearing for his life after what he's done, but I will say that the anger of those who are doing the threatening is COMPLETELY understandable. Someone has been murdered, the murder has been caught on tape, the murderer's identity is known, but he is not treated as a murderer because he carries a badge.

And people wonder why the black youth walk around with a chip on their shoulders. When will people realize that although it appears that we have made some progress, it is clearly not enough. They say we have come so far, but we still have so far to go. Well, I feel that we really haven't had that much progression because this country is still structured in a way that makes it impossible for certain people to thrive. Hell, there are systems in place that make it hard for certain people to live! You may no longer be able to hang a black man, but you sure can make the threat (Jena) and you sure as hell can shoot to kill if you are a man of the law. What message does this send to our adolescent black boys? Barack has made it so there is no longer a reason that you can't shake off the impossible and do and become whatever and whoever you want in America. As long as you don't have your black ass in the "right" neighborhood at the wrong time because the locals will call the cops on you for looking suspicious. As long as you don't move a muscle if you ever get stopped by the police because they will beat your ass and say you were resisting arrest. As long as you don't enjoy any after hours fun and catch the public metro system back home... because you might not make it back home.

I am going to provide you a few videos that you can check out to get a little more on the story or to just enlighten yourself on the many struggles that the black community is still fighting to overcome. You might not wanna have the little ones looking over your shoulder because I believe this first video does show the actual shooting of Oscar Grant. I also encourage you to check out the short documentary that Eb has over at Black Renaissance Woman. It features the reactions and fears of black adolescent boys to the murder of Sean Bell. It kind of puts this whole thing in perspective when thinking about how these kinds of events affect young boys who run the risk of meeting the same fate just because they are black.



This video gives a pure and multi-perspective response to the shooting of Oscar Grant.



If you have room to stomach one more video you can click --->here<--- to see a recent broadcast of the latest in the case. This brief broadcast identifies the officer and talks about how he has been affected by what he has done. Oh woe the hell is he!

Last night, as I was on the phone listening to my sister in-law L fill me in on the latest drama between her brother and my other sister in-law V, I could feel the wrinkles forming in my forehead, harsh language brewing in the back of my throat and the sudden urge to head an intervention. Why oh why do we women put up with so much wrong doing from the men that we love? More importantly, why oh why do we women put up with so much wrong doing from the men that we love, who are also the father's of our children? Is the idea of having a nuclear family, the idea of keeping the family together, really more important than happiness itself?? And furthermore, even more importantly than that, why oh why are we women still blinded by love??? I know this is a lot to think about right off the bat, especially if you are happily married or in a happy relationship, but it definitely deserves some thought.

I don't know if I should go into details about our conversation, and ironically, this is why I have decided to do it anyway... because I have had enough of the "i'm not getting involved in that" speech. I want to get involved right now because, although sometimes getting involved can cause tension, it can also cause change, save lives and a bunch of other positive outcomes that far outweigh any possible cons.

Apparently my sister in-law V is stuck in an abusive relationship and has been for some time. I guess its hard to see a way out of a love that is over 10 years old and has produced 3 children, two of which are brand new twin girls by the way. However, when this love is quick tempered, frightening, and leaves bruises on your first born, its time for someone to get involved. When you call your sister in-law up to tell her all of the horrible things that her brother is putting you and your babies through and your sister in-law doesn't point you in the direction of the nearest police station, its time for someone ELSE to get involved. I can't even count how many times "I'm not getting in that", "she has to help herself", "I had to leave because I was ready to slap the shit out of him, brother or not!", came out of my sister in-law L's mouth during our conversation. I find it amazing how abuse becomes so normalized in certain communities that people STILL equate "helping" someone to meddling in their business. We really need to wake the hell up and smell the roses before we end up placing those roses on our loved one's grave site.

I don't truly believe that sister in-law V is really "in love". I think that love faded a while ago, but that she is so exhausted and stressed out from having to pour all of her energy into caring for the children and trying to work on a man who isn't fixable, that the words "help me" or "I really want to leave/I really want him to leave" just wont come out of her mouth. And just because she hasn't said the words that means that she wants to continue to suffer the abuse? What then is the meaning behind her frequent phone calls to sister in-law L, crying uncontrollably? What then is the meaning behind her packing up the kids and spending two days at sister in-law L's house? You'd have to either be a fool, very use to abusive situations or just unwilling to recognize a cry for help if you couldn't see that sister in-law V is actually silently begging for someone to get involved.

Since sister in-law L doesn't want to strain her relationship with her brother by standing up to his abusive treatment of a woman who has been up every night for 8 months feeding and tending to two new babies, and of a 4 year old little boy who needs to be loved rather than subjected to name calling and pain, then screw it, sister in-law Bar B will get involved! I could care less if he pitches a fit with me, unlike sister in-law V, I am not in love with him and I don't sit around and take bullshit from men, which is why Miss J.'s dad and I are NOT together. What I do care about is the well-being of my sister in-law, nephew and little nieces. I am still thinking long and hard about the best way of going about this intervention. I think it would be best if I can have a heart to heart with sister in-law V just to let her know that I know what's going on, its not something that she has to remain a part of no matter what anyone else says and that all she has to do is say the word and it can all be over. If she needs any more convincing than that, well then I am prepared for that too. Whatever it takes to prevent a bad outcome.

On Wednesday Wednesday, August 27, 2008 Matt posted this entry on his MySpace blog:

MY LIFE

Current mood: blessed

Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes

Well I should be in bed but I thought to myself, I have never wrote a blog in my entire myspace life and I been having this "principal in my head". I will keep it short and straight to the point. I been thinking about my life and it is not complete but it is getting there. I thought about the things I have accomplished over the years it has truly been a blessing. It just shows people when you put your mind to something you can make it happen. I still haven't accomplished everything, but I am working towards it and I believe if it is God's Will, it will happen. All of us have goals but they are all different, hold on let me take that back, they could be the same but with different agendas. I just see the potential in our generation to make things happen. Some other people in past generations, and sometimes in my case our generation don't feel that way but let's prove them wrong. That is what drives me proving people wrong when they think I CAN'T but then, I keep making things happen. It feels good but at the same time you wonder why these people can't stand you or like you. There are people that don't support anything you ever do but if you prove to them you can, they can still hate, but "Who looks Stupid"? Exactly!!! But this is one of those things I learned and wanted to share with my friends on myspace. Everyday we learn something new. Take life as a test and shoot for a better score each day. It doesn't have to be an "A" the next day, but let's hope it improves. Hope you can use this one day when you feel the way I feel right now!!!!

God Bless 08/27/2008

Matt Garcia