Ever since Miss J was an infant I've felt like I've made a terrible mistake... in naming her. You see, I knew in my heart what she should be called when she was still in my womb. It was a no brainer. It was always my plan, that if I ever happened to have a daughter she would be named after my mother. My mother named me after her mother, and my grandmother was named after her grandmother, so why not keep it going by giving my daughter the name of the woman that I loved and lost. A way for her to exist outside my faded memories.

I shared the name with Miss J's dad and he wasn't impressed at all.

"Emma?", he said. "Naaaahhh, naaaahhh, that's.... country."

Why I didn't put up a fight I still don't know, to keep the peace possibly. I agreed to look at baby names with him online and wasn't happy with any of his choices and he wasn't happy with any of mine. Turns out, I wasn't the only one with a game plan for naming children, he had a system already in place. Before Miss J, he was already a father of two girls named Jelayne and Jamayah so his search for his third began and ended in the "Ja" prefix. He played around with first and middle names, compared meanings. Finally, it all came down to his "Jalia" and my "Jalen". Out done again, Jalia she became. He even picked her middle name, "Damali", which I didn't like, but agreed to because I fell in love with its meaning. Rooted in Arabic, it means beautiful vision, and that she most certainly was.

Although I accepted the name, I was never completely sold. Deep down I still wanted my Emma. I went as far as to go down to the court building and pick up the forms to do a legal name change. It wasn't successful due to the fact that I had no real idea of how to complete the thick ass packet and had a hard time finding someone to help. I figured it was all gonna be more trouble than it was worth and just chalked up the lost and stored the name away to await my next future arrival.

Fast forward to last week...

Jelayne has come down to visit.

Like clockwork, everyone keeps referring to her as Jalia. They both spend a lot of time reminding people of who they are. Their dad even does it! Reminds me of my great-grandmother, who always had to go down the whole list to get to the kid she was actually talking to. Romina...Sha... I mean, Ebo... Jean... ahh shit, you know who I'm talkin' to.

Miss J: I'm NOT Jelayne, I'm JALIA!

Me: Maybe you should change your name.

Miss J: Yeah, I know... Gosh. I know, what about Mia?

Me: Um... no, if you wanna change your name then it has to be Emma.

Miss J: Ah man.

Me: Emma or nothing at all.

Miss J: Ok, then I choose Emma.

The kiddies headed back to school on Monday and when I picked Miss J up from her after school program there were a sea of voices calling out behind us, "bye Ella". Once outside I asked, "why were they calling you Ella?" To which she replied, "because that's my new name." "No, not Ella, its Emma", I reminded her. "Oh, I thought it was Ella." Yesterday I looked through her backpack at the drawings that she did while at the after school program and found this one with "Ella" written at the top of the page. It appears that Miss Ella is running through the grass chasing a yellow rabbit.


So now she wants me to inform her teachers that she is no longer Jalia, but Emma. She has already informed all of her friends, and their mothers, as one asked me on the walk to school this morning if we had legally changed Jalia's name because she said her name was now Emma. Boy, she sure is taking this whole name change thing seriously.

Divine intervention?