I have been wanting to come here and talk to all of you since Sunday, however, life has been interrupted by my thesis research. I changed my topic last week, which I will tell you more about in a future post. I am kinda getting tired of my own thoughts about my thesis and I don't want to bore or irritate you with more ranting and raving about how unhappy I am over this whole process one minute and then how happy I am to be in this process the next minute. I assure you, the next "thesis post" will have a meaning other than ranting and raving. Also, because I feel like I have been slacking on my research lately (getting too much rest on the weekends) I feel a level of guilt for being here right now, especially since I am suppose to be working on a 6-8 page annotated bibliography as we speak.

I decided to dig deep into my Myspace blog archive to get a poem that I wrote a while back. Let me warn you now, its not a happy cheery one, but one written at a time in my life when I was stuck in an unhappy place. These words represent my emotional release. Part of me can't believe that I felt/feel these things and had the balls to actually write them down and share them in a public place, and part of me really likes the raw emotion of this piece. I call it, The Sad Side...


Do you know what its like to feel like you are nothing?

Do you know what its like to be unappreciated and unloved by someone that you love?

Do you know what it feels like to be depressed?

Do you know what it feels like to be misunderstood?

Do you know what its like to raise a child on your own while being a full time student?

Do you know what its like to be an outcast?

Do you know what its like to be raped?

Do you know what its like to be looked down on?

Do you know what its like to want to commit suicide?

Do you know what its like to be medicated?

Do you know what its like to watch your great-grandmother die of lung cancer?

Do you know what its like to see family members throwing their lives away?

Do you know what its like to ask for help and no one listens?

Do you know what its like to make a big accomplishment and feel like you've done nothing?

Do you know what its like to grow up without a mother or a father?

Do you know what its like to wish you never became a mother?

Do you know what its like to feel unattractive?

Do you ever wondered why you are not good enough for the opposite sex?

Do you know what its like to wanna be HAPPY?

I do.